In the Library, beside the Bookcase, with the Wand
by WitAngerandBravery
Summary: When Sirius and James suspect that their significant other's are cheating on them with each other they feel the need to investigate, and we all know what happens when James and Sirius get curious. Warning- WolfStar. Rated for sexual innuendo. ONESHOT R&R!


**Warning- Wolfstar and sexual innuendo**

_Disclaimer- I don't own HP_

**In the library, beside the bookshelf, with the wand**

"Sirius, mate, I need to tell you something." James Potter whispered to his best friend, Sirius Black.

Sirius glanced up at him. "Can't it wait?"

James shook his head.

Sirius turned and said to the girl sitting on his lap, "Sorry Nancy, but I have somewhere else to be."

"My name is Nina." The girl said, irritated.

"Whatever darling. Off you go." Sirius made a little 'go away' gesture with his hands.

The girl scowled, and stalked off.

"Now that's taken care of. What is it, mate?" Sirius turned his attention to James.

"I saw them in the library, and they weren't studying the books." James looked like he was about to faint.

"What? Who?" Sirius demanded.

"L-Lily and Remus!"

Sirius almost choked. "_My _Remus? With _your _Lily? Are you sure?"

"Sure as sure can be!"

"Remus would never cheat on me." Sirius said dismissively.

"That's what he said about you, but look at what happened before." James said, referring to Nancy… or was it Nina?

"That was nothing, just another hopeful trying to make me switch teams. Yet again." Sirius waved his hand in the air rather flippantly.

"Look, you need to see! Get the map and the cloak!" James insisted.

Sirius grumbled, but got up anyway. He wanted to see what was getting James so worked up.

**M**

"Okay, where did you say they were?" Sirius asked, pulling out the map and saying the password, before starting to search for the aforementioned pair.

James caught sight of something up ahead, and froze. "You know what Sirius? I'll meet you there. I need to make a little detour."

Sirius, engrossed in his search for Remus and Lily's dots on the map, nodded absent-mindedly.

James covered himself with his invisibility cloak, and backed away quickly.

"Mr Black!" Professor Minerva McGonagall's voice rang out in the almost empty hall.

Sirius swore and quickly hissed, "Mischief Managed," Before hiding the map behind his back.

"Mr Black, what _are _you doing?"

"Trying to stop a particular red haired devil from stealing my boyfriend?" Sirius offered.

For a second, McGonagall looked like she was about to laugh, but then her usual severe expression was pasted back on. "I'm sure. What is it that you're hiding there, Black?" McGonagall asked sternly.

"What, this? Just an old piece of parchment my dear Professor, that has nothing at all to do with this conversation."

"Then you won't mind if I confiscate it." McGonagall snatched the parchment out of his hands.

"Isn't that weather nice today?"

McGonagall frowned. "It's raining, Black."

"And isn't Hogwarts just _beautiful _in the rain?"

McGonagall rolled her eyes, and brought out her wand. "_Reveal your secrets_." She commanded, sweeping it across the parchment. Curling letters stretched across the parchment, and McGonagall read what was written aloud.

"_Mr Moony presents his compliments to Professor McGonagall and would like to add that her article in __**Transfiguration Today **__was rather excellent.  
Mr Prongs agrees with Mr Moony and would like to add that she looks quite dashing in her emerald robes (which are, by chance, the same colour as Miss Evans' eyes).  
Mr Padfoot would like to say that Professor McGonagall is in denial about her very secretive relationship with Professor Dumbledore, and would appreciate it if she refrained from giving out too many detentions to a certain Mr Black.  
Mr Wormtail agrees with all that was said, and would like to bid Professor McGonagall good day."_

McGonagall looked up. "It would be a shame to confiscate this, Mr Black. Off you go, I didn't see anything." She handed Sirius the map, and swept past, leaving him in a shocked stupor.

James' head suddenly popped up next to him. "That was bloody amazing."

Sirius just nodded his head slowly, still stunned.

"Snap out of it!" James punched Sirius in the arm, and Sirius glared at him.

"Right, right, let's go. I will not have my Moonykins dallying with the devil."

**M**

Sirius and James crept into the library quietly, taking particular care to avoid Madam Pince's sharp gaze. Even though they were under the invisibility cloak, they were wary, as Madam Pince was thought to have X-ray vision. The theory was yet to be proven wrong.  
The pair hid behind the bookshelf that was conveniently blocking their view of Lily and Remus.

"Oh, Remus!" Lily was breathing hard, sounding very, erm… Excited, if you know what I mean. "That was _brilliant_!" James gave Sirius a look that screamed, 'I told you so!'

"You think?" Remus wasn't breathing as heavily, but he sounded thrilled. "I wasn't sure that I was doing it right. Are you okay, Lily? I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"That right there is so messed up, it's not even funny." Sirius hissed to his best friend.

"No Remus, I just got knocked against that bloody table when we did it."

"How could you, Lily?" James said, appearing from behind the bookcase. The situation he expected was very different. Lily was bent over, clutching her stomach, whilst Remus was a few metres away.

Lily stood up straight. "What did I do?" She asked, bewildered.

Even though this wasn't the scene he was expecting, James held his ground. "You slept with Remus!"

"_What_? I did no such thing, and even if I did, we wouldn't do it in the library. This is, like, the most non-sexy place in the school!" Remus came over and stood next to the irate redhead.

"James, I'm _gay_. Give me one reason why I would sleep with Lily." Remus said.

Sirius decided to reveal himself in that moment. "Because she's _imperio_'d you into believing she's sexy. And she's a redhead who has no soul." He said matter-of-factly.

"_What_?" Lily gasped. "Did you just call me soulless?"

"Is it legal to be that moronic?" Remus wondered.

"How could you _wound _me like this Remy? Your own boyfriend. I thought that we had something!" Sirius shook his head sadly.

"Sirius, I will literally pay you to _shut. Up._" Remus said.

"You cheated on me with _her_! _Lily Evans_! She's Prongs' girl Moony!" Sirius said loudly. Madam Pince shot them all a glare, Sirius immediately quietened down.

"Sirius SHUT UP! Lily was helping me with the DADA homework! Jesus Christ…" Remus said.

"DADA homework?" James repeated disbelievingly. "Please. We heard you guys talking after you… You know-ed."

"He was testing a spell on me! He needed help with _stupefy, _so I offered! I didn't expect you two to think that we were having SEX!" Lily nearly shouted the last part, and Madam Pince gave them a glare, that said 'Get out before I make you'.

"Shhh! Lily, Sirius and James are just being idiots. They're most likely taping this right now. They'll then show this at your twenty first, and we'll all laugh at how stupid they are." James and Sirius saw this as their way out, and quickly agreed.

"You caught us!" Sirius sighed.

"It was meant to be a surprise." James shook his head mock-sadly.

"Oh. Well then. That explains things." Lily completely bought it.

"Hey Moons?" Sirius said.

"What, Padfoot?"

"I love you…" Sirius said, smiling sheepishly. "And, on the topic of love and all that rot, I promise that I wasn't out on a date with Mindy the other day. She just came and sat at my table."

"And started snogging you?"

"Mindy's very affectionate."

"You do realise that her name is Madeline, right?"

"Whatever Moony, I'm just saying that it wasn't a date."

Remus snorted derisively, collected his books, and left the library with Sirius following him, trying to justify his date with Mandy… Or was it Monique?

"Lils? You know that I love you, right?"

Lily rolled her eyes at her boyfriend, and gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Whatever."

"And I promise not to show that at your twenty first."

Lily raised an eyebrow. "You'll show it at my eighteenth instead?"

James grinned and put his arm around her shoulders. "You know me too well."

**Hello again! Personally, I think that this is a bit rushed, but anyway… Thoughts?**

**Love,**

**Silvs**

**P.S. For those of you who've read Moments with the Marauders, you might recognise the McGonagall part. That's because I took that bit from this oneshot (I didn't think that I would be uploading this).**


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